I know I was going to take a break from blogging, but sometimes you just have to. Each and every one of us is made up of varying emotions that come out when prompted. Happiness, joy, and pride are obviously the ones we hope to see more of, but then there's sorrow, depression, and anger. These are emotions we try to keep under wraps. They can oftentimes, especially anger, lead to spitefulness and grudges. They're dangerous in that they breakdown character and destroy relationships. The only way to combat these emotions is to take a breather, collect yourself, and learn to forgive. Life is too short and too precious to hold grudges. I make mistakes. You make mistakes. It's a fact of life.
I remember when I was in pre-marital counseling with our priest he told us about something he called "snowballing." It's when, in the middle of a fight, you bring up past offenses that have absolutely nothing to do with the argument at hand. It does nothing to alleviate the current situation, but instead drives a wedge further into the relationship by hurting the other person's feelings. Every time I see myself doing this, I imagine that snowball melting. It's history. Done. The past. Forgiven. Human nature makes it very difficult to do this...to forgive and to forget. But if we're to keep our relationships healthy while we're here on earth, it's a necessity.
Now the question remains - what do you do with all this raw emotion? How do you deal with it without hurting the people around you? Simple. We write about it. Whether it be blogging, like I'm doing now, or writing it into your MS (man, our characters take a beating when we're in a bad mood!), the artistic form is a healthy way to vent. It could be singing soulfully after a realtionship comes to an end, painting with wild, bold brushstrokes when angry or upset, or working spitefulness into your MC's character after being pushed away when reaching out for forgiveness. It's a whole lot better than taking it out on those around you or saying something you'll later regret. Art. Is. Therapeutic.
What are some examples of how you've dealt with your raw emotion? Have you had your MC do something totally cruel just so you don't? Or maybe you've had something cruel done to them?
Writing is certainly a coping strategy, and I've used it often--but I don't know that I'd advise people to blog (or Tweet or Facebook) when angry! It's gotten so many people in trouble, and once it's out there, it's out there. But creative writing is a different matter entirely, and I totally agree it's a useful way to process emotion!
ReplyDeleteI get into this a little bit on my post today about depression. I think it's important to write about our emotions and put them into fiction. It's sometimes the ONLY way I can cope with the deepest, darkest, messiest things I feel.
ReplyDeleteI hope everything is alright. *HUGS*
Sarah - Yes, I certainly wouldn't recommend blogbashing anyone either. Although you'd like the world to feel your angst with you, it's not the smartest thing to do.
ReplyDeleteMichelle - Thanks for the hug. :) I agree with you. This is especially important for those of us who have kids watching our every move. It's best to live out those feelings in our make-believe worlds.
I agree, its always therapeutic to take our mood and throw it into our characters, but then again, sometimes its not fair to them either. I think its more important to just say what we think and feel right then. Call a family meeting, or a friend meeting, write a letter if you can't be level headed at the moment. But get it out. Direct those feelings and comments in the right direction. Not expressing ourselves is inadvertently staging the snow fight for another time, while building an arsenal. Very nice post.
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